Monday, July 13, 2015

How We Lie To Ourselves - The TRUTH To Get What You Want In Life

We lie to ourselves.

All the time.

Sometimes we don't even realize how we lie to ourselves.

Case in point, I see people who say things like "I'm doing everything I can do and still aren't getting the results I want."

The reality is, no you aren't.

For example, I want you to reach up to the sky as high as you can.

Did it? Good.

Now reach up higher than you did before.

Did it? Good.

However, I thought you supposedly reached up as high as you could the first time?

You just lied to yourself just now!

We do this type of stuff ALL the time. You do it. I do it. We all do it.

We do it in every area of our lives too. Whether it comes to our relationships, our health, our finances or our spirituality we constantly lie to ourselves about our best efforts in our endeavors.

Two years ago, one of my mentors at the time, a gentleman by the name of David Wood taught me something very powerful. There are five key mistakes that people make that are responsible for the majority of the failure that they experience in life.

It doesn't matter if they are failing to get to their desired weight, failing to attract their ideal spouse or failing to achieve their financial goals. If you take a hard look at their efforts, I can guarantee you that they are committing one or more of these five key mistakes.

Here they are:

1. Lack of clarity - People who fail tend to lack clarity of their objective. Case in point, if your goal is to "lose weight" that is a lack of clarity. When I set out to lose weight, I was very clear on what I wanted. I wanted to get down to 160 pounds and I wanted to lose inches on my stomach.

Because I was very clear on what my objective was, I was able to get down to 160 pounds and lose inches on my stomach. Just like I imagined it.


I was clear on my objective in my mind BEFORE my objective became a reality in my life.

2. Lack of following instructions - You can be clear on your objective. However, if you don't follow directions, you're not going to achieve the results you are looking for. Most people SAY they are doing everything, but the reality is they are LYING to themselves. They aren't doing everything.

When I hired my personal trainer Kris Hollie Fitness, he gave me STEP-BY-STEP instructions on what I needed to do if I wanted to lose weight. Guess what I did? I did what he told me to do. Losing weight really isn't that hard. It comes down to two things...

Eating less...


Exercising more.

Kris put a plan together to help me eat less and to help me exercise more and I followed the plan. The end result was I was able to hit my target weight.

Here's what's so amazing about it.

I wasn't even PERFECT in following the instructions!!!!

There were a NUMBER of days that I didn't eat enough protein or I ate too much fat. There were days that I didn't exercise the way I was instructed to do so. There were days where I took in more calories than I was suppose to take in.

I STILL hit my target weight anyway!

You don't have to be perfect to get results. However, you have to follow the instructions and the bottom line is if you are following instructions from someone who is PROVEN to know what they are talking about, you are going to get results. If you're not getting results, you are probably NOT following instructions.

3. Lack of making adjustments - This one is BIG! You can have a clear goal and you can follow the instructions. However, you have to be willing to make adjustments along the way. If you are not willing to make adjustments, you aren't going to get the results you are looking for.

Case in point, the original workout plan that Kris provided for me, it was too much for me based on where I was physically. I was unable to complete the workout. This was a problem because by not completing the workout I was not building the muscle I needed and I was not burning the calories I needed.

So guess what I did? I made adjustments!

I had Kris modify the plan for me so that I can get the results that I wanted while at the same time actually complete the workout. There were several times where we had to modify the plan and make adjustments. However, we did what we had to do.

If what you are doing isn't working and you have followed the instructions, you must make adjustments!

My friend Tony Rush said that success comes down to doing the following:

1. Set a goal

2. Take action
3. Get a result
4. Make adjustments
5. Repeat Steps 2-4 until you achieve it.

What many people do is they take action and get a result. However, when the result isn't what they want, they just keep doing the same thing over and over again. Then they expect a different result. 

That's insanity! You must make adjustments along the way!

4. A lack of commitment - Commitment is doing the thing that you said you would do long after the feeling that you said it has past until you get the results that you said you were going to get. It's that simple. When you are committed to something, you are going to do whatever it takes, regardless of what it takes for however long it takes. It's that simple.

With my weight loss goals, I was committed to doing what it took however long it took and I was willing to do what it took. I didn't come to my trainer with a list of things that I refused to do. I told him this is my situation, this is my goal, you tell me what I have to do.

Many people say they want success in a particular area. However, they have a list of all the things that they don't want to do. I want to lose weight, but I want to keep eating McDonalds, I want to keep eating ice cream and potato chips and I want to sit on my butt and watch Love and Hip Hop all day.

Sorry, that's not going to cut it.

The only exception to this is if what it takes violates your core values. For instance, if you go to church on Sundays and someone tells you to be successful you have to skip church, you should never do that. Never violate your core values and beliefs to achieve an objective. I can guarantee you that there is someone who shares your core values and beliefs that has still achieved the objective you are trying to achieve. So it's not worth it.

5. A lack of energy - You can be clear, follow instructions, make adjustments and be committed. However, if you don't exert the necessary energy for the necessary amount of time and effort that is required, you will not achieve the results you are looking for.

For me to lose weight, I had to exert energy. My energy points were in the areas of physical exercise and in the areas of food consumption. To be successful at my goal I had to increase my level of physical exercise and I had to decrease my level of food consumption. I had to do this for a consistent amount of time too!

If I did this for only one week, that's not long enough to achieve the results that I wanted. I had to do it for longer than a week. In my particular case it took me about 90 days to get the results that I wanted.

What are the energy points for your objective? This is why feedback is so important. By taking action and getting feedback, you will discover what your energy points are. Then you will know exactly what you need to focus on in order to get the results that you want.

So that bottom line is are you TRULY willing to do what it takes to get the results you want?

This system I outlined is proven. It works. The question is are you going to work it?

Or will you continue to lie to yourself?

The choice is yours.


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  2. Great blog Roosevelt!! I enjoyed it and took notes!!